the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize
