Christians are straight up FREAKS
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
