4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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