mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Randomize
