Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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