all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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