He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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