i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
