dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
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