pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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