Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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