If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
