BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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