If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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