i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
