It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
