So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Randomize
