is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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