The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
