if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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