I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
