He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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