'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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