So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
