you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize
