I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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