Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
