Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
