So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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