Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
