out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
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