and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Randomize
