he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
