I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
