I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize