We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
