Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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