I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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