I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
