i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
