You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
