Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
