there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
