ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize