This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
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