their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
