9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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