gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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