so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
