So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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