Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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