That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
